So Long ....

for so long,
i have done things so wrong,
i have been withdrawn, miss informed,
i pushed on, headstrong,
so long,
i retreated, heeded , pleaded,
to be miss informed,
 to be loved against all odds,
to ignore all odds,
so long,
my reality seemed like bestiality,
inconceivable, not achievable,
fairy tale, stories over ale,
misled, misread,
all distorted in my head,
i should have said,
i would rather be dead,
than misled,
knocked up and tied down,
than being spoon-fed,
i should have spoken out,
screamed out loud,
instead i let me be misled.
so long,
i lived with doubts
because i thought i couldn't live without,
that my time was running out,
so i shouldn't sit this one out,
now i know it was my fault,
by default,
 i knew you were not good enough,
schooled enough,
  i let you ,
cause i was tired of being called Miss
some may hiss,
or take a piss,
at this point,
or say this is a diss,
this is no diss,
this is a long hiss
as i say rest in peace...
this chapter is over,
i may age everyday,
as all earth beings may,
but i will rather be grey
and lie in hay
than to be with you, Mr hayes...